In the book Dignity: Its Essential Role in Resolving Conflict by Donna Hicks, PhD she defines Inclusion this way,
“Make others feel that they belong, whatever the relationship. Whether they are in your family, community, organization, or nation.”
Dr. Hicks has expanded on this definition over the years,
“No one likes to feel left out or that they don’t belong. When we are included, we feel good about who we are. When we are excluded from things that matter to us, we feel an instant reaction of self-doubt. What is it about me that I wasn’t included?”
Have you ever felt like you did not belong? Have you ever felt like your voice was not being heard? Have you ever felt excluded because of how you looked, what you believed, who you chose to love, or by how you talk? I am sure most of us in our lives have felt that pain of being excluded. It is a pain and an emptiness that is difficult to describe. When you are made to feel like you are not valued it can have a devastating effect.
I spent much of my young adult life trying to fit in. I want to be part of the group. I changed who I was so that others would like and except me all for the importance of being included. I was like a chameleon. I would change based on the group of people I was with. I lost my identity. I did not know who I was. I became angry, depressed, and I pulled away from others. It was a dark time in my life and there were times I did not think I would recover.
I was able to come out of the darkness because of all the people who believed in me. It was not easy, and I fell a few times along the way but each time I had a fall I was able to get up and most of those times there was a person there to help me. I owe my success to those people who accepted me for who I am. Yes, I worked hard but most people cannot succeed without the help of others. My life experience taught me the importance of being inclusive. It taught me how important open honest communication is. The heroes in my life taught me how to love and accept others based on the value they bring. This is how I live, and this is how I lead.
I have this Cross Pen that a nurse gave to me back in 2011. It was when I had my first leadership role. It says, “Always kind and caring.” This pen is a reminder to me to hold on to those values my mother taught me. It reminds me to always remember those who believed in me when I lost faith in myself. It is a reminder to be inclusive and give back to others. As a leader there is nothing more satisfying than seeing the success and growth of the people you have led.
I will always strive to as Dr. Hicks says, “Make others feel that they belong.”
What will you do today to honor and elevate the dignity of others?
Charles Redd RN
Dignity Freedom Fighter
Dignity Freedom Fighter 