Tomorrow (4/2) is my mother-in-law’s birthday. Happy birthday grammy Pammy. It is also the day we remember the life of Pam’s mother, my wife’s grandmother, and my children’s great-grandmother Nana Lu. Grandpa Hally was the hero and WW II war veteran of the family, but it was Nana Lu who was the boss. Out of all the relationships in my wife’s family Nana Lu and I had the toughest journey.
She was the protector of the family and if it was on her mind, she spoke it. You never had to guess where you stood with her. I respected that but sometimes those words and thoughts cause a divide that may be hard to come back from. My mistake was that I chose to be silent and when you do that it allows people to fill in the blanks and then they begin to form an opinion about you that may not be true or accurate.
My silence did not allow her to know me and for me to know her. I felt that I did not need to prove myself and that if she did not think I was good enough then it was her loss, but to be honest it was both of us who were losing. We almost lost the opportunity to get to know one another. I almost lost the opportunity to build a relationship with someone who was part of the greatest generation. Fortunately for me I realized this before it was too late, and we were able to create a relationship that I believe benefited both of us.
I took the first step to open my heart and mind and from there things began to change. She got to know me, and I got to know her. I am so grateful we were able to build a relationship before she left this earth. The building of that relationship was my roadmap to understanding dignity. If I did not take the chance to open my heart, we never would have gotten to a place where we could be family. We would never have gotten to a place where she would be one of my biggest cheerleaders when I graduated from Elms College and when I got my first leadership position. I never would have had the honor to sing at her funeral.
Thank you, Nana Lu, for giving me the chance to know you and helping me to understand the true meaning of life, love, family, and Dignity. Your words continue to run through my head. Those two great phrases you used to say to us when we were leaving from a weekend visit
“Drive fast and take lots of chances” and “Watch out for the other guy”
When we honor Dignity, it opens an amazing opportunity to build relationships that can last beyond our time here on earth.
Dignity always Prevails.
Charles Redd RN.
Dignity Freedom Fighter
Dignity Freedom Fighter 